I'm basically driving my dog insane at this point

I'm playing "Brodyquest" and "Promises Promises" back to back, not really as a scientific experimentation, per se, but just to see if my dog can learn to sing mad music.

So far, the "not really a scientific experimentation" is turning out to be a failure.

This Is Possibly The Worst Way To Die.

So there was a car wreck out in Turkey involving some cars, a lorry, and a van. A van filled with bees.

I laughed heartily when I read this:

Rescue workers, police, medics and beekeepers tried for more than an hour...

And the laughter turned to horror when this happened:

...to release two people trapped inside the vehicle, their faces carpeted with angry bees.

Jesus god damn christ.

The Times: Man Dies After Bee Escape Hives In Crash.

DANGER

They day that man teaches dogs to wield guns is the day that mankind has doomed itself.

You don't believe me? EVEN AFTER THIS:
A Memphis, Tenn., man is in critical condition Wednesday after his dog shot him in the back.

I laughed so hard that a quantum cat materialized in my living room, got scared, then vaporized itself, that was how much I laughed at the headline. Oh, and there's this:
Hunter recovering after being shot by dog

They aren't even trying and they are killing us! Dogs, the silent but adorable and possiblity mentally retarded killer.

Mad House Is Doing An Iron Man Anime.

From Warren Ellis:

This is the second of the two teaser pieces shown at San Diego on Friday. This is the test animation for the IRON MAN anime series I’m writing, produced for the south east Asian market. Note test animation: it’s intended to show off the style of the piece only. Nothing in here reflects the actual content, just the design and the aesthetic and the animation. The only character in this piece that is in the actual series is Iron Man himself, okay?

I am frighteningly excited about a Warren Ellis Iron Man, considering that he was able to rescue GI Joe from an ignoble bloodless animated piss of a joke.

Well, mostly, sadly, the final climactic show down seemed to have lacked that certain "umph" I was expecting. Then again, I was mostly expecting buckets of blood in a torrential showering of goat fucking horror. I may have a bit skewed a viewpoint about everything.

Anyway, considering that the production studio is Madhouse (check out their list of accomplishments), the animation quality would be equally excellent.

Now if only they could tone the overwhelming Japanese anime culture out of the film...

Ok, I will allow about 15 seconds of cat-eared-demon-girls sucking off giant-robotic-squid with a tanker of bukkake on the side, but only 15 seconds.

Edit: HOLY SHIT THEY ARE DOING A WOLVERINE ANIME AS WELL?!?!?!?!

Wow, it's like watching Ninja Scroll in slow motion... I hope they could put some focus on crazy fast fighting scenes.

RIP David Carradine...

Last week was the glorious return of E3, through all its pomp and circumstances my eyes were glued to the internet tubes desperately slurping out any more news about upcoming video games and gaming oriented technology, which is a long way to say: I was too busy being creepy about video games to come across what may be the most fascinatingly disturbing piece of news:

David Carradine, 72, was found dead in a hotel in Bangkok.

That by itself may not raise many eyebrows, but then the circumstances became weird. How weird, you ask? Well how about "found with his arms hanging off a bar in the closet completely naked with a rope tied around his man bits"? Does that count as weird?

To make situations worse, apparently some Thailand Rag had plastered pictures of David Carradine's dead naked body in all its autoerotic asphyxiated glory.

I'm not going to even bother posting any pictures because:
1) I don't have any
2) I'm not looking for any god damn pictures of a dead naked David Carradine with strings around his man bits...
3) Just... NO!

David Carradine joins the proud list of celebrities like Jerzy Kosinski (in 1991) and Michael Hutchence (in 1997) who died in a senseless act of chocking yourself while playing with your wiener.

But let's also not forget about the Ninja conspiracy, as in "David Carradine was investigating illegal underground martial arts and was executed by assassins for KNOWING TOO MUCH!"

Most of these are wild theories and speculative accusations, and considering that the news source came out of Thailand, I would take it all in with a large spoonful of lye-flavored salt.

RIP David Carradine, you deserved so much better.

Do You Recognize This Guy?

Let me give you a clue:


More at The Smoking Gun

Blundering Bomber

Reuters

The Japanese Spa Industry Decides To Shower Everyone WIth Red WIne...

JAPAN'S BATHERS SEEK DIFFERENT HEALTH OPTIONS - UPI.com

Want Your Kids To Play Nice?

How about having follow the Geneva Convention while playing Call of Duty?

I asked Evan to google the Geneva Convention. Then he had to read it and then we had to discuss it. This we did. So the deal is that Evan has to fight according to the rules of the Geneva Convention. If his team-mates violate the Convention then play stops and Call of Duty goes away for a while.

BoingBoing

BBC News Has Something Amazing You Have To See

Click here to witness crazy!

RIP Ron Silverman

Actor Ron Silver dies in NYC at age 62 of cancer

Obama Buying A New Marine One Fleet? Not Anytime Soon.

Putting the whole budget issue aside, there is a new reason why the White House will not and should not purchase the new fleet of Marine One-s: Iran's got their hands on the blueprint of the entire avionics package for the new Marine One.

According to ZDnet:

Bob Boback, CEO of Tiversa, said, ”We found a file containing entire blueprints and avionics package for Marine One. … What appears to be a defense contractor in Bethesda, MD had a file sharing program on one of their systems that also contained highly sensitive blueprints for Marine One,” Boback said.

Here I am, stuck with IE because our IT department won't let me install Firefox because of security/licensing reasons, and you fucktards go and ruin it for the rest of us with your inadvertent act of treason because you can't kick your Beyonce addiction. You god damn shit stain, I hope your genitalia grows teeth, falls off, and eats you alive with a side of explosive bowel disruptive gangrene.

The US Airways Flight 1549

A miraculous landing, one of the few good news coming out of that particularly grim news cycle, and, little do you know it, there was another significance to this picture as well:

This picture, one of the first pictures available about this story, was actually first posted on twitter. Giving credit to an already very credible site.

Yeah, by the way, apparently blogs are old news, now if you want to follow celebrities, you should probably follow them on twitter, ya dig?

WTF, DID FRED DURST JUST MEOW?

I Feel Kind Of Bad For Knut

According to the LA Times Blog, orphaned polar bear Knut now not only lives the life of your standard solitary polar bear since the death of his keeper, but also may be kicked out of the Berlin Zoo due to lack of space.

Maybe they can send him to Japan's Kushiro Zoo, considering they have a none-mating pair of female polar bears.

Irregardless (it's apparently a word, and I imagine that if JR is reading this right now his left eye just burst open in a shower of raged hatred and grammar superiority) of what will happen to Knut, let us remember Knut for what he really is, a young adorable cub that captured everyone's heart.

Firefighter Feeding A Koala Bear Water

This is still the cutest thing I've seen all day.

It's just so unfortunate that it's set against the backdrop of the biggest "mass murder" in Australian history.

They have named her "Sam", due to the misconception that she was a male koala.

Smuggling Pigeons in Your Trousers?

Yes, those are live pigeons, in padded envelopes, in his pants.

Also found were:
1) A prescription bottle filled with 2 pigeon eggs
2) A money belt filled with plant seeds
3) An undeclared egg plant.

This illegal smuggling business is embarrassing and getting out of hand.

Telegraph

Her Cat Fell 34 Stories So She Dangles Him By The Edge To Teach Him A Lesson

I thought the news about the cat possibly falling 34 stories and landed with very minor injuries cute and all, but this picture just tells so much.




Moggy's purrfect landing - Local News - Gold Coast, QLD, Australia

A Knee Surgery on His Ankle

what?

I think Natalie is excited to meet Hillary

That is just a guess though.

Robert Mugabe is Terribly Insane

The current leader of Zimbabwe, not content at just allowing his country's econmy plummet right past the shitter and straight into a cesspool of cholera laden puss pit, has declared that his country's current outbreak of cholera is not, in fact, an ineffectual display of his leadership, but instead a "biological warfare waged by Britain".



In case you are wondering, Gordon Brown is the current Prime Minister of England.

Mugabe and Blagojevich must subscribe to the same bat-shit-crazy playbook of the crimnally insane.